Thursday, January 28, 2010

VODAFONE-HAPPY 2 "EXPEL" U...

So...I get an sms from vodafone one fine day about me submitting certain documents to the nearest vodafone store for verification and all that blah...!!! The nearest vodafone store for me being just 5 mins away from my house :P. So I wonder, *hmmm* okie so I got a message. I wondered how many times do I need to submit my documents considering the fact that I had to submit these same documents a couple of years ago as well huh. No one else I knew got that message. I save the message in my cell phone (so that I remember I "HAVE" to do that work:P) and "move on" :p. After a few days, I get that same message again. And I wonder AGAIN *hmmm* I hope I don't have to "go" and submit :(...Do I really need to do that work :(? I ignore that message once again *widest grin*. But vodafone knows me too well :P. I get that same message again and this time it even has a final submission date voilla...!!! Ok, so vodafone's really putting me to work eh :(...bad vodafone...So I finally wake up today morning and call up vodafone customer care for all the documents that I need to submit since the last day to submit is day after tomorrow :P. So I get the details, collect all d documents I require--->the xerox as well as the originals. So I am groggy as it is :p, but I get ready to go. I remember I have some other work to do too, but n-ah was too lazy to finish off any other work lolll:P.
       So I reach the vodafone store, I ask this vodafone fellow if this store accepts documents and as he was replyin, I was just hoping that he says "yes" coz I had no intention and mood of going all the way to the churchgate store :p. To my utter relief, he said "yes" and I went like "yayy" :P. He asked me if I had all the necessary documents and I replied "yes". He asked me if I had the xerox of my sim card, to which I replied in a very astonishing fashion, a "no". So he asked me to get a xerox and so i went and got a xerox lol :P.
         I came back and realise that I'll have to wait a hell lotta time for my turn seeing the crowd there. So it's hot and the a/c in the store doesn't appear to work well huh. I approach the same fellow again to write down my name in his register since that's what he was supposed to do *straight face*. So I find myself get a serial no. and no token no.
       So I am waiting, waiting and waiting and since I had nothing better to do, I started observing people. People that were in the store, people that were entering the store, people that were outside the store. Yeah what-a usage of time huh lol. It was quite interesting but :P. I could spot people of different shape, sizes, height, dressing-sense, smartness meter :P, "cool" peeps, peon, gujju ladies :p, working people, teens, oldies, people checking their watch time and again to get back to their work etc :p...As I was seated, I watched a middle-aged man come in the store. He looked a little irritated. He asked the register-guy about where to submit the documents. The R(register)-guy reiterated everything that he was telling the other people, to him. This middle-aged man went a little berserk when he learned that he needs to get a copy of his sim card. He started telling the R-guy ( in a pitch, a little too loud) that he wasn't told in the sms that he has to get a copy of the sim card and he was kind of making an issue. At that moment, I thought to myself, cmon dude what's the big deal? Go across and get a xerox of it. Looking at all the commotion, some executive (or whatever you call those people who solve your problem at the table in the store lol) came and asked what is happening. When he saw that the middle-aged man is way too adamant on the sms-issue, he told him, "Its ok, we will see later, not a big deal". After a while, one of that bersek-man's friend came in. As the bersek-man was telling his friend about the sms-sim-card-issue and they were discussing about that, it occured to me then that maybe a customer should be informed about what all is required to prevent distrust and frauds on the store's part. Coz anyone can ask for any document under false pretenses. Who would you turn to then ? Coz you won't be having anything in written form.
        Then, I see another man of about early 30s walking in the store. He appeared completely drunk (but he wasn't drunk :P, he just appeared) and his facial expressions were no less than those of a killer loll:p. I see another female, somewhere in her 20s, a typical gujju :P. Harrowed that she looked, she started gathering information from the R-guy about the documents she needs to submit. She was handed a form that she had to fill up and I realised I wasn't given that form. So I grab myself a form too and ask for a pen from a lady. As I started filling out my form, her no. came n she took her pen away :(. It was a blue pen :( So I asked another guy (in his teens) for a pen. He gave me a black pen :(. As much as i disliked writing with black pens, I not only had to fill out my entire form in black but also had different inks on my form :|; 1st blue and then black. So as I was filling out my form, this pen-guy sits next to me coz there was a vacant seat. Aw man, his cologne was not only strong but it was way too sweet and irritating.
           So my form's been filled out, I am still waiting and "observing" people lol :P. I came across this very funny gujju lady of about 50+ :P. She was quite a character and her clothes could tell that too lol :P. With an awfully bright and comedy combination of purple and orange salwar kameez, every time she opened her mouth to say something, she was funny lol:P. In the meanwhile, this gujju-20-sumthin lady who looked harrowed, was apparently even feeling hot :P. In a high-pitched tone she addressed the manager about the a/c not working and started giving suggestions to combat the heat :p.
           I was now growing restless of waiting. Even my fidgetting with myself, my cell phone, my wallet wasn't helping me pass my time. Waiting, waiting, waiting I noticed another gujju-late-30s-sumthing couple. Now these are the kind of people especially in gujjus that I love to call "naye naye paise wale" lolll for the simple fact that you can take people out of Gujurat but you cannot take Gujurat out of people lol. I looked at the female, she was wearing a maroon long top, with some capri or something and pink chappals :O. I was horrified :O. As if this already wasn't looking mortifying, she was wearing a shawl :O in summer-called-winternaye naye fashionistas" lolll :p. :O. Omg I wondered, it's freaking hot outside and here she is wearing a shawl :O. God bless the "
         I couldn't help but look at people's shoes. I observed shoes from boots to worn-out-floaters to pink chappals to sneakers to even worn-out-chappals. The R-guy was being flocked by the crowd to check how much time more before their "turn" comes. Seeing the long list on the R-guy's register, a fellow asked him to cancel his name. The R-guy looked like he was having fun crossing out names lol coz when another fellow was checking his name, the R-guy asked, "cut kar du kya?" lolll, to which the other fellow replied, "aree nahin :O". Being asked so many questions, the R-guy now just stopped replying to some of the people lol:p. 
   I looked around and everyone was pissed off coz of waiting for so long. I, in my own merry little world, was enjoying all the reactions of different people, their gestures, their actions which were quite "comicy" lol. I couldn't help but laugh, giggle, wonder :p. So I was waiting waiting waiting with the "lakme" ad's jingle going on in my mind (yes i tend to sing even d most insipid jingles, songs, tunes, whatever that is stuck in my head that time :P), the man with the killer-facial expressions headed towards me and told me, "agar aapko sirf documents submit karne hain toh udhar karo, udhar sab kar rahe hain, itna time waste nahin hoga wait karke." As he was saying this, he pointed towards a stand where a few people were gathered with their documents. I thought to myself : and this is the guy who I was considering drunk huh :P...so it proves never judge a book by it's cover:P. I, for some unknown reason, really love commenting and forming opinions about strangers lol:p coz it's fun when I come to know something about them which proves to be entirely opposite to what I thought about them :P.
         So, even though we weren't supposed to submit it that way, I still got up and headed that way since my serial number was 72 and 70 number was going on. So I thought I might as well go check out if I can submit it so casually and go back home. When I went there, this executive was already "solving", as he liked to call it, a few problems of a few people with documents. One of them being the man who made the sms-sim-card-issue. The manager went away for a while, so I asked the berserk-man if we had to submit the documents here. He smiled at me confusingly and answered, "kya pata kidhar submit karna hain, kuchh maloom nahin hain". So as I was waiting, the executive started calling out, "token no. 62" repeatedly. Now no one knew who was token no. 62 since we weren't given any token nos. Now the crowd had really had it. Some of the people started yelling, "kuchh bhi organised nahin hain", "is this the way you work", "token no. toh diya hi nahin humein", "kitna time lag raha hain". The crowd's anger and yells died it's own but quick death. In the meantime, my number came and finally I went at the executive's desk. So I submitted the documents, so he asked me a few details to confirm it's my number, so I answered his questions, so he verified the originals, so I asked him a few questions (damn I cant stop asking anyone questions now, can I lol:P?), so he answered my questions and so my work was done.
         I breathed a sigh of relief that finally my work was done :P and c'mon its not a small thing that I did it all by myself after a very lazy start :P. So I was a little bored, but interestingly also surprised :p. If you want to catch such an act of comedy within a small span of 1.5 hours, I suggest you head to your nearest vodafone store NOW lolll :P...I for a fact have started observing people quite a lot ;)...!!!

2 comments:

  1. hahaha lol... wat an excerpt, you essay writer :P....lol.. lakme ad waala jingle and wrong opinions to gujjus...phew!! Quite some content covered in one post haan!! :P...
    But, this is of no use to me.. I don't use Vodafone..:D
    --
    RoHiT
    dial-a-denial.blogspot.com

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  2. loll sachchi :D no exaggeration :D:D:D:P:D:D:D

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