Tuesday, June 28, 2011

An aberration called Emotions...

Efface that facet, off of your face,
embrace that new alibi, adorned with lace,
let go off the past, it's not here to stay,
embroil yourself into the madness, the madness of your prey.

The violent force is blowing, all through your soul,
the latent emotion is imploring, to be released on parole,
the foliage scatters down, laid in the path of your ravage laughter,
you look back with a serene perplexity, and only chose to move forward.

Leave all that that is bygone, you shall not need it any more,
for you now have a new role to play, a more efficacious lore,
the rhythms will now dance, to your tune of rancorous sanctity,
it's time to switch to aquarelle, and leave the shoddy oil paints to bleed.

Your 'disguise' will be your armour, your detachment will be your shield,
you will fight in a new way now, a fresh victory awaits on the field,
the ignoble valour is glistening, it's ready to be charged,
an epiphany distracts you, and you choose to react.

In the midst of the chaos, a canary deftly flutters your way,
amidst the inimical thumping noise, it only chooses to wisely say,
and sing in a sotto voce, a melodious song, that hypnotises your soul,
your nightmare transforms into a reverie, you stand awestruck in cold.

And then you realise, if it's really worth,
this diabolical transformation, which will only haunt like a curse,
maybe the new dark alibi, is not required just yet,
maybe there's still a song left for you, that you can write when you fret.

Because there is always a choice to do something, I say,
and there will always be a choice to not do something, it's not a cliche,
but it ultimately depends on what you want to do,
you've been encumbered with the decision, be prudent, and not shrewd.

For life always moves forward, it's the people who don't,
with dints, dents, lacerations and scars, our soul intermittently gets stoned,
and when you're on the verge, of losing your grip on it all,
just halt and look back, let yourself realise your life before every fall.

Because it's hope and faith, that guides you from inside,
it's easy to get lured with darkness, but difficult to stand aside,
for there is a final end, to everything that survives,
from the soul to the body, once lost, nothing can be revived.

And release your resistance, let your negativity evaporate,
into the omnipresent invisible air, and feel the residue of happiness,
and hold on to all that you want to, live the moments while they last,
for the 'present' and the 'future', all strive to, one day, become your 'past'.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

I don't remember if I like it or not...

  The clock is ticking, I know it's not for me,
time is flying by, I know it's never meant to be,
an asphyxiated state, I'm fighting real hard,
even though I want to embrace it, I cannot make that positive start.

I'm incomprehensible to myself, for the first time in my life,
I've confused myself to the point, where nothing now seems bright,
am I really moving forward, or am I coagulated in time?
Torn between my mind and invisible feelings, do I really don't care a dime?

The more I think, the more I feel choked,
nothing's ethereal now, I cannot fool myself more,
the nascent feelings, need to wriggle and dissolve now,
for the truth is hard to fight, especially when one's incapacitated to interpret it and how.

The answers will never be laid in front of me,
I'll have to unravel them one at a time with speed,
but I'm on the verge of losing it all, and because of my raging grief,
I want to give up on it all, but I cannot, that's just not me.

There has to be a way, I want to live it all before I vanish,
for the clock is still ticking, and I now know it's for me, it cannot be banished,
but I guess some things are never meant to happen,
no matter how strong your hopes get, they will always lay barren.

In this lightning speed world, I've hidden myself somewhere,
no matter how hard I try, I cannot share it with anyone for whom I care,
and I just stand frozen, still, in the midst of these 'humans',
without a face, without a soul, with an emptiness without the space atoms.

Pondering, muttering, mumbling, I tread the path everyday,
altering decisions, trying to find happiness in every way,
but there's something missing, I know not exactly what,
that gets the best of me, and renders me incomplete like a sentence without a full stop.

And all these passions, that haven't been felt yet,
and all these epiphanies, that are yet to be decoded after tests,
will evaporate without being witnessed by that special person, will die their own deaths,
or they will be buried, deep inside my cage, where they'll flutter with my every breath.

I thought I wouldn't have to bury, anything within me,
I thought I'll keep alive, every little thing that made me happy,
but now I see how life changes your perception,
no matter how hard I try, I no longer feel 'happiness', I no longer see any solution.

But yet, I'm walking forward blatantly,
still in the foolish hope of acknowledging even the slightest of anomalies,
I'm exhausted, I'm tired, I want to rest for a while now,
but it's me against myself, who wants to keep going on, no matter how.

If only I was as weak as the others, I would have written more about my feelings,
but I have an alibi to maintain, a mask without healings,
a soul without dependency, a thinking without faith,
a confidence without happiness, a 'me' without 'myself''s embracing weight.

Girl with a rose image: Tamara Kwan (http://www.tammylynn.co.uk)